Does Fear Stop You From Following Through?

Uncategorized Oct 18, 2017

Each season I get a nudge from the universe about my next stage of growth. The past few months have been full of lessons and challenges about commitment and follow-through. I have come up against fear barriers left and right but I am slowly learning to move through them.

Maybe you are experiencing this at your stage of life - feelings of Fear, Imposter Syndrome, and Doubt (the Big Three). These are big barriers that EVERYONE deals with. Please know this - when these feelings sneak up, you are not alone - it is completely normal. With practice, you can learn to move forward despite the Big Three. 

Typically when these feelings appear, your brain is trying to keep you in your comfort zone by staying "safe." However, safety is relative, and to continue to grow and expand as humans, we need to step out of our comfort zone and explore new ways of living. While this is perceived as "dangerous" to the brain, it is an essential part of our happiness and success in life. 

SO WHAT DO I DO WHEN I FEEL FEAR AND WANT TO RETREAT TO SAFETY?

Great question! There are many ways to deal with these feelings. I find that outing the Big Three to a friend or family member is quite effective. When you talk about your feelings instead of keeping them inside, you dilute the power they have over you. We've all been there - you have a doubt, then you start obsessing over it in your head. Then, you create imagined worst-case scenarios and decide that life is over. Do you know that feeling? That often stops the progress you've made, ending up back in your comfort zone (comfort zone = zero growth).👺 Getting out of your head is crucial.

Here are a few steps I take when dealing with fear and resistance to moving forward:  

  • What is the worst-case scenario? This is a great question to ask when fear pops up. Write down (or talk it out) the worst thing that can happen if you do X. Oftentimes, the worst case is that you just end up back where you are now. So you are living the worst-case scenario? 😆
  • What is the BEST-case scenario? This is a fun one. Write down all of the amazing things that could happen if you continue to follow through on your path of growth. Go wild here. If you are going to make a guess, it may as well be in your favor. 💃🏽
  • What are you actually afraid of? Typically, you think you are scared of the DOING, when in fact you are scared of the FEELING. IF you were to fail, the resulting feeling of shame, "being a failure" or the judgment of others is WAY scarier than not hitting a goal. So dive into the feeling you are afraid of, and look at ways to reframe it. 
  • Failure is the way. If you don't "fail" then you can't learn from that experience. There is a great quote "The path to success is paved by failure." When you think of it this way, you see that failure isn't such a bad thing. While it can be painful, tiring and frustrating, it is the other side of success - you can't have one without the other. When you learn to re-frame failure and see the lessons OR successes within each try, you will be more willing to put yourself out there and follow through. 
  • What is actually holding you back? At the end of the day, you are living this life for you. Yes, you have people that you love and care about, but if you live for them (or don't grow because of them), you may end up feeling resentful, unfulfilled or dissatisfied. Make it about you - inside you know what is right, and what is on the other side of fear. Ask for support from those who can be there for you emotionally. You do not have to share your dreams, goals, and process with everyone. Let your actions and success speak for themselves. This is your journey. 🦋

SO WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH FOLLOW THROUGH?

This is the best part! When you use the tips above to help you deal with the Big Three, you open yourself up to KEEP MOVING FORWARD. That is a follow-through. You break the cycle of self-sabotage and allow yourself to make progress, bit by bit. This is how we find success. 

For example, I committed to sending you all an email every week. 📩 Yetthe last two emails (this one included) have been challenging. I have felt the internal resistance to writing and sending this to you. Thoughts such as "no one cares," "what is the point of sending your thoughts to people?" and "you don't have time." were flowing through my brain. I felt afraid to keep sending emails because it meant I was following through with a goal that could lead me toward success. I felt like an imposter, not believing anyone actually wants to hear from me. I felt doubt about the topics I choose to cover and judgment from others. YIKES - and I'm just sending a weekly newsletter! 

You don't have to be making a massive change to feel the Big Three. Each small step that holds you accountable and propels you toward your goals can lead to fear and self-sabotage.

I experience these self-sabotaging thoughts because my brain resists consistency. Now I know that for me to be successful I need to continue to show up for myself and my business. And one way to do that is to share with you all. 😍

So here I am, showing up and following through.
Where in your life do you need this lesson?
Where do you feel a sense of Fear, Imposter Syndrome or Doubt?
How can consistency and follow-through help you move past those feelings to the next level?

At the end of the day, you will continue to experience all of the Big Three feelings. Every time you level up or are about to grow, they will show up. They will beg you to stop what you are doing and retreat. But you will stand strong and continue the course. You can let fear ride in the car, but not control the wheel. Get used to it and find ways to work through it so you can fulfill your need to grow and expand in this life. 🌈

We will do this together. I cannot wait!

Close

50% Complete

Two Step

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.